Avengers Movie Night
by Schadenfreudessa
Summary: The Avengers have their weekly Wednesday Night Movie Bonding Time. This week, it's Tony's turn to pick a movie.


When Fury required the Avengers to all move in together, he had suggested putting together a 'family night' for bonding properly. They had started with board games, but that ended badly as Tony and Clint were extremely competitive and Natasha cheated (Tony made the mistake of calling her on it during a particularly fierce game of Monopoly; now he flinches whenever she comes up behind him). They had moved through all the different sports next. Yeah, that playing field was anything but even. Tony and Bruce were useless no matter the sport, Clint had miracle aim, and Natasha was in great shape. But none of them were any kind of match for the Steve/Thor sports-tacular dream team. All the games were too much of a horrific slaughter to even warrant talking about. They are never to be mentioned in the Avenger's mansion again.

Finally, Coulson suggested movie nights. It had been a stroke a genius that shocked everyone into silence for a moment. Then Tony made a comment about how he would have thought of it eventually before heading inside, Steve and Clint excitedly following at his heels, and Natasha might have actually been excited (with her it was a bit hard to tell). And so began Wednesday night cinematic adventures.

They decided to start off with the classics, working Steve and Thor up to more modern movies. Natasha proved to be a movie buff, always picking the films until they were up to date on all the important, and then they all took turns. Tony liked horror films, Clint like fantasy or period films, Bruce liked science fiction and Natasha like thrillers or dramas. Thor and Steve had both developed a love of action and adventure movies, but Tony was privy to some secret knowledge of Steve's.

Tony had come up from his workshop super early one Saturday morning to get some energy drink from the fridge. As he was walking past the den, he noticed the bright lights indicative of the television being on. Thinking that maybe Thor had fallen asleep watching cartoons again, Tony silently slipped in through the back of the den, not wanting to disturb a sleeping Thunder god.

Steve was sitting on the couch, a handkerchief pressed up to his face to stifle the sobbing that was wracking his shoulders. There were tears streaming grossly down his face as he sat and watched the movie. Tony had to stifle a chuckle when he realized the movie was Up. So Tony started to stay up, sneaking into the den to see what Steve was watching that night. Steve cried through Old Yeller, My Sister's Keeper, The Notebook, Bambi, It's a Wonderful Life, To Kill a Mockingbird, Atonement, and La Vie en Rose. Steve seemed to be especially moved by The Shawshank Redemption, The Boy in the Striped Pajamas, Letters from Iwo Jima, and Pearl Harbor. Tony kept Steve's secret, loving (but not at all surprised) that Steve was a sappy movie fan.

This particular Wednesday night, it was Tony's first turn to pick the movie. He thought about busting out a good classic scare (The Exorcist had been his first choice), but a new film had just come out that he wanted to see. It had gotten some good reviews earlier, but Tony had been too busy with Stark Industries and the Avengers to see it then. And he figured what the hell, might as well make everyone else watch it with him. So Tony had JARVIS get a copy of the movie ready for their evening bonding time while Tony settled into what had become _his chair_, waiting for the other Avenger's to join him in watching _Apollo18_.

Eventually everyone was settled in front of the large, HD television. Clint and Natasha had claimed the small couch to one side, Clint sprawled out across the cushions with Natasha held tightly to his chest. Clint had turned out to be a huge baby when it came to scary movie moments, so he spent a lot of time with his face buried in Natasha's hair. Natasha just looked put out by the entire arrangement. She didn't do 'cuddling'.

Steve, Bruce, and Thor were crammed onto the large sofa in the center, Thor sandwiched between the two smaller men. This had become their typical seating order ever since watching _Cloverfield. _During one of the underground scenes, Thor had freaked out and tried to smash one of the 'tiny evil demon spawn' with an end table. The television and end table were beyond repair, and a large chunk of wall was no longer structurally sound by the time they had successfully calmed the God down. Now, Thor always sat between the two Avengers best able to control him, and the movie room was devoid of any tables, shelves, or extra chairs. Probably a good thing with the movie they were watching tonight.

Coulson was even joining them this evening. Steve had grabbed him one of the kitchen chairs, and now the SHEILD agent was seated calmly between the odd couple and Bruce. On the few nights when Coulson would join the Avengers movie nights, he and Bruce would chat quietly through the movie, picking apart plot devices and story lines. Sometimes, if Tony was particularly disinterested in the film, he would join them. Tonight, though, Tony was mildly sure that Coulson was there to make sure Tony's movie choice wasn't too _Tony._

With everyone present, JARVIS started the movie up and lowered the lights. Tony was excited for this movie. He thought the concept and story were especially interesting. The film was supposedly a series of video tapes from a secret, three-man moon mission on Apollo 18. It featured some shaky hand-camera and some fixed camera footage, and it was presented as evidence of a government cover-up, so it had an extra dose of realism. Happy had seen it some time ago, and he claimed that it was actually quite terrifying. Tony hoped that the film could elicit some hilarious reactions out of his teammates, and if it didn't, than Tony had a few scares ready to use.

The movie started off pretty slowly, introducing the three astronauts through interviews, then talking about the reason for the secret mission. Next came the rocket launch and the actual moon landing, with two of the men going down to the moon's surface while the third remained in orbit. The entire movie had a creepy feel to it, as the surface of the moon (and space in general) feels extremely alien and isolated.

About half way through the film, things stared to get very interesting (there was an abandoned Russian lander, a dead cosmonaut, strange movements and interference on the exterior lander cameras, and mechanical problems. Tony was leaning forward in his seat, caught up in the movie. Coulson, Bruce, and Natasha were quietly discussing the inaccuracies of the story. Clint was already cowering behind his girl, and both Steve and Thor seemed to be guarded, but enjoying the movie so far. Then shit got scary.

The movie featured a mix of just general creepiness, pop-up scares, and really freaky occurrences. Clint was whimpering like a puppy, holed up deep in the couch cushions behind Natasha. Natasha, Coulson, Bruce and Steve were all watching the film with varying degrees of abject horror. Coulson was the most calm, his face just a blank mask of mild amusement mixed with some annoyance, then there was Natasha, then Bruce, then Steve. Thor was gesturing wildly at the television, exclaiming loudly every time something strange happened.

This pattern continued throughout the rest of the movie, with Clint sounding more like an injured puppy as the story wore on. At one point, Steve had to pull Thor down when he tried to stand, yelling at the 'foul moon beasts' that made the astronauts face explode. Because of course there were moon spiders. The freaky little arachnids disguised themselves as moon rocks, and they even made Tony's skin crawl a bit.

But then the movie was finished and all the astronauts were dead (Steve sniffled a bit as images of the dead men and their families were displayed). All the Avengers were still milling about in their seats (Natasha was trying to coax Clint back from the depths of the couch), and JARVIS hadn't even brought the lights up yet when Tony stood. He stretched and yawned, working the tightness out of his shoulders. The movie hadn't been too long, but he had sat still, entirely absorbed in the film, so he was stiff. Tony turned to Steve, asking his thoughts on the movie, when he froze. Something had darted across the room at the edge of his vision, or so he thought.

Dismissing it as the product of too little sleep and left over fear from the movie, Tony turned his attention back to his friends. But it happened again, something moving quickly to hide underneath the couch where Clint was still being a chicken. Steve, noticing his friend's distraction, looked over to where the happy couple was sitting. He and Tony both saw, beyond any doubt, a _something_ move across the wall, then more somethings were moving across the walls and floor and ceiling. Even the other Avengers had noticed now.

Clint was practically crying now (he always got panicky when there wasn't a bow in his hands), with Natasha standing protectively in front of him. Coulson was still sitting, but he had his gun out now, though it was only lying across his lap. Bruce was standing on the couch next to Steve, who had placed a calming hand on the scientist's shoulder, helping to keep him from Hulking out. Thor was standing in the center of the room, looking for a weapon. And Tony was clawing at the arms of his chair, feet tucked underneath him, feeling extremely exposed without his suit (Fury had been hounding him to take some serious fighting classes for when he was suit-less, but Tony had blown them off).

Then the things (Tony realized they were the moon spiders from the movie) attacked. They went mostly for Clint and Tony, somehow knowing who were the most vulnerable. Steve and Thor were doing an admirable job of keeping the little buggers off of Tony while Natasha, Hulked-out Bruce, and Coulson guarded Clint, who was a screaming mess by that point. Soon, though, Tony began to feel them dropping down onto his shoulders and chest, or crawling up his sweatpants. He threw them off immediately, but it was obvious that the Avengers were being overwhelmed.

Steve was looking a bit desperate now, and Tony was really starting to freak out when he saw some very large and ominous movement in the hallway. And then, a very large and ominous moon spider was entering the room, slowly unfurling its legs to their full length in the space of the room. It was easily larger than Tony, Steve, or even Thor, and a fuck-ton scarier. Tony's stomach plummeted, and both Thor and Steve gave out strangled cries of desperation and fear.

Then the large spider leaped, and it leaped at Tony. He was knocked to the ground, the incredible weight of the spider pinning him down. His limbs were trapped beneath the bulk of the spider, but his right arm was free, and he was using it to hold back the head of the beast. It was snapping at him with large fangs. The spider's entire body was jagged, like a rock, and he could feel the rough edges tearing through his clothes and scoring his body with what would probably become lethally infected wounds, just like in the movie.

Tony fought back desperately, and he knew the others were fighting to get to him, but it wasn't enough. Tony's strength was failing fast, and soon, his body gave out to exhaustion and injury, the spider batting aside his arm and moving quickly in for the kill. It's large fangs came down on Tony's neck and…

Nothing.

There was no pain or death or injury of any kind. In fact, there were no spiders. The room was empty of all murderous alien arachnids. But the bullet holes and general destruction of the room showed that this hadn't just been some terrible, movie-induced nightmare. The Avengers were all looking around dumbly, loudly expressing their confusion at the sudden disappearance of their foes (except Coulson, who was calmly cleaning his gun). Tony was just happy to have the large moon-spider removed from his chest, but there was still something holding down his legs.

Propping himself up (painfully, as his wounds were also very real), Tony realized there was a very smug looking God of Mischief sitting across his lap. Suddenly, the pieces clicked, and Tony sighed in relief as Loki leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his lips. The green-eyed bastard looked insufferably arrogant, so Tony moved quickly forward, tackling Loki onto his back, trapped beneath Tony's body. This got the other Avengers' attention, and they quickly realized what was going on.

Clint was still shaking; terrified and scandalized that even a super villain would be so cruel. Coulson, Natasha and Bruce just brushed the entire incident off, quickly moving on to cleaning. Thor laughed loudly, congratulating his brother on a prank well played. Steve looked like he wanted to comment, or possibly even scold Loki for the trouble his actions caused, but Loki's history of ignoring authority figures (and the fact that he and Tony were excitedly making out and pressed together) made him turn and leave the room with Thor, going to get trash bags to pick up the remnants of Tony's and Coulson's chairs.

Tony and Loki were oblivious to the mess and the cleanup effort, lost entirely in each other's' mouths and bodies. Tony, after all, wanted some revenge for the stress that Loki's prank had caused him. He would somehow scare the Trickster God later, though, as right now his revenge was headed somewhere far more pleasurable for the both of them (like the bedroom, where they were now _very quickly_ headed). Well, especially pleasurable for Tony. He had a few plans for tormenting his lover a bit first.


End file.
